For months I’ve been trying to find something that I could write about. There’s been a lot of changes going on with my life and I think just to be safe, I haven’t written about it cause I wasn’t sure how it would turn out! Needless to say, since I’m actually officially engaged, I think it’s time for me to introduce to you the love of my life: Zackariah. He’s someone who loves me with everything and I him; He makes me laugh and smile on the cloudy days. If you follow me on social media, Zack’s face is pretty familiar to you.
A little about Zack and me. We both are PK’s (pastor’s kids), we both love to laugh and have fun, we love traveling and exploring new places. There are so many little things we have in common it’s hard not to have fun when we’re together. I’ve always wondered (and I’ve talked a lot about it) about if I’d ever find love because of Kabuki syndrome. I talked about it a lot, I expressed my concern and fears. Here I was nearing my late twenties and still wasn’t close to being in a serious relationship. It’s funny I’ve always heard that someone comes into your life when you weren’t expecting it and it’s exactly what happen in this situation. I had laid down my fears about being alone or ever being loved by someone and in comes my guy.
Oddly enough Zack and I met online. I was feeling like I had to broaden my horizons in the dating arena. I didn’t have much luck in my social circles--and I think it was a little awkward being the pastor’s daughter with all that goes with that. I just was looking for someone who would be interested in getting to know me for me, didn’t know about my family, the church or even the dreaded subject of kabuki syndrome at first.
Last year I had to break it off with someone because it just didn’t seem right and that left me alittle confused and heartbroken. When Zack contacted me online the farthest thing from my mind was to start that all again. But I felt comfortable and had a peace with him. Zack and I took our time getting to know each other and building a friendship. We would write these long massive emails that turned into texts that could be probably published as novels and then came the phone call! That phone call that lasted 3 hours. By the end of the phone call we were talking about him making a visit from where he lived in Oregon to Santa Rosa where I live.
I was scared out of my mind leading up to the first visit. There many late nights on the phone with Zack talking about our hopes and our fears. The day finally came where Zack flew into the tiny Santa Rosa airport. I was waiting in baggage claim nervously but the moment he came up behind me, tapped me on the shoulder and I turned around all that nervousness and fear disappeared. It was like we had known each other for years, even though it was only a short time. Zack’s visit lasted two days but it was evident that there was something between us and that we would be foolish not to take the opportunity at a chance at love and happiness. We didn’t know how this long distance thing would work but we’re going to give it our best shot. Thankfully because he works for an airline our long distant relationship wasn’t that long distant at all. We would take turns going back and forth from California to Oregon.
I knew from the very beginning that this relationship was different-- something clicked with Zack and I that wasn’t there before. I’m not going to lie and say it wasn’t the scariest thing I ever faced because it was! I mean we were talking forever, this may just be the one, was he the one? I really struggled with if he could even love me despite my Kabuki Syndrome, did He really want to take care of someone who had a syndrome that didn’t have a cure? Every single time I brought up my fears Zackariah would always without a doubt say the most loving, caring things and always end with “Jordan, ALL that doesn’t matter to me. I’m falling for you and I just like you for you”. That right there was what I was searching for this entire journey for someone to see me as Jordan, not Jordan the daughter of Pastor Ross and Barb, the sister of Zack and Peter or even Jordan who has Kabuki Syndrome, but simply Jordan.
In February we started talking bigger things like marriage--where’d we live and all that. We really wanted to live in the same state while being engaged. I was fairly certain a ring would come before June of this year but I didn’t want to put any more pressure that was already on him. In March a position opened up at the Santa Rosa Airport and Zack took the opportunity and applied. The very next week he had an interview with the manager here in Santa Rosa. He came to see me for a couple days before the interview. The day before his interview after a crazy filled day while standing out overlooking the view over San Francisco Zack got down on one knee and asked me a question I’ve waited all my life to answer. Right there in that moment I was reminded of God’s faithfulness. He had brought me the one that He created for me and His perfect timing. The very next day after he proposed, Zack was offered the job here in Santa Rosa and packed up everything in Oregon and moved out here all in 2 weeks!
To say the last month has been crazy and overwhelming would be an understatement but it’s been beautiful. We love being in the same city! To be able to get the chance to see each other every day whether just hanging out at the house, going around town doing errands or making dinner for him when he gets off work. It really is the simple things that we weren’t able to do together that bring us so much joy in this new season.
Wedding planning is in full swing here! It’s been so surreal planning my own wedding but it is very much the real deal. We’re about 7 months out from the big day and as the day draws closer we are getting more and more excited about starting our new journey together as a couple. My prayer as you read this as parents of kabuki children, that you would be comforted by our story. As I have said many times life doesn’t end with a diagnosis of KS--there is so much that lies beyond that. It’s possible that one day someone will come into their life and love them just like Zack loves me. My lesson in this season is love is possible-- I just had to learn to accept myself and trust the Lord before it was the right time.
My Sweet Zackariah, welcome to the other part of my world! The place where I left a lot of my emotions and feelings, fears, etc. I found my voice on this blog. I discovered there was a girl with a story to tell and hope to offer. I remember the day I told you about this and how you could leave-- I wouldn’t blame you-- but instead you read the blog; you watched the YouTube videos and everything else. You didn’t run-- no-- you just wanted to know more about me and called me incredible for doing what I was doing. You have supported me in everything and have loved me fearlessly. Our friends and family have watched our love story unfold and now we are sharing our story to the world of KS families.. I wasn’t expecting to find the love of my life when I answered your friend request but I am so very glad I did. Saying yes to marrying you was the easiest question to answer. You have made my life not only better, you have brought out the very best in me. My world forever changed the second I meet you. Thank you for loving the girl that wasn’t sure she could ever be a wive. You are the exactly what I prayed for! Thank you for opening my eyes to so many things. I didn’t think it was possible to love someone as much as I do you but every day that passes I fall more and more in love with you and everything about you. Our journey is just beginning and I couldn’t be more excited to do life with you. I can’t wait to become your wife someday very soon!
Loving you forever, Jordan
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